Shared: Claude, Groot, and a Photo Shoot

I still haven't had my orthopedist appointment for my knee and the pain seems to be getting worse.  When I am at home, I pretty much live on the sofa with my leg up and a pillow under my knee.  It's the only relief I can get at this point and even that's not 100% anymore.  I've spent the night sleeping like that way more than I (and Andy) would like.  Hopefully, it won't be for too much longer.

Sitting in the same spot and not being able to do what I want or should (without a lot of pain, that is), I find myself getting a little stir crazy.  Especially after I have read all the internet and played all the games.

So my favorite Bearly Dreadful I made named Claude van Dumm and his best friend Baby Groot entertained me with a photo shoot. :)

Here a few of my favorites.  I hope they at least make you smile. :)

Wore: Break-A-Leg

HI!!!

Hi!  So nice to see you!  How are you?  Glad to hear it!  Me?  Oh, I'm fine.  Thanks for asking.  No, really... I'm okay.  Yeah, my knee still really, really, really hurts but I'm trying to not be a whiner about it.  It's to the point where I just want to cry every time I have to walk more than 20 steps.  But, the good news is I *FINALLY* have an appointment with the orthopedist next week.  Yay!

Unfortunately, because I am spending a lot more time with my leg up, I am online shopping way more than I should be.  I can justify about 75% of the purchases, at least.  Like the bottles for the wedding mead Andy is making.  I also recently got this top from New Look while it was on super sale:

New Look

The mirror at work was super streaky so I couldn't get a full body shot, though.  I paired this with one of my long black skirts so you can probably imagine the rest. The mesh makes me feel super edgy and broody as you can see in the top picture.  LOL  I still feel kinda bad ass, though.  As bad ass as I can feel anyway.

Here's a more "serious" one.  ;)

It's SO serious that the shadow of my nose is pointing out my chin pimple quite nicely.

For date night last week, it was my turn to choose so I chose to go to Joe's Crab Shack.  I will spare my non-meat-eating friend any specific details (sorry, Goth Gardener!) but my meal came with this bib which made me laugh more than a sane, rational adult probably should have.  At least that was Andy's take on my giggles. :)

It also seemed apropos since my leg is gimpy.  I love that word.  Apropos.

Anyway...Do you partake in retail therapy?  If so, what's your go-to store, shop, or website?

Until later, sweet p'taters!

(Yes, I am overly-caffeinated right now  Why do you ask?  LOL)

Shared: Sparkles in the Mundane

I am an artsy kinda girl and have always worked in an office.  I've been at my current company for almost 12 years now, swimming through seas of light grey cubicles.  I was an assistant to the buyer for seed and fertilizer for over 9 years until they did away with the merchant assistant positions.  I was absorbed by Supply Chain Support which was a step down position-wise but my pay the stayed the same and I didn't lose my benefits.  Within about a year, I was promoted to a Supply Chain Specialist which means I pretty much play in Excel spreadsheets and create purchase orders for stores all day.  I am working toward some other positions but I make due with where I am.

The hardest part for me, though, are these light grey cubicle walls.  I know they need to keep things neutral, etc. but they just make me sad.  So I try to keep my cube fun and visually interesting.  We moved floors recently so I used that time to get rid of cubicle clutter and I am slowly revamping my little 6'x6' space.

I also thought I'd share what a typical day is like for me because I KNOW  you will find it SO interesting.  LOL  I actually do find these interesting when other people post them but then I've also admitted to being a stalker of the mundane already. ;)

I got these earrings from Wish which work well as push pins!

4:35 AM
Grumble at 1st alarm and hit "Dismiss"
4:40 AM
Sigh heavily at 2nd alarm and hit "Dismiss"
4:45 AM
Groan at 3rd alarm and hit "Snooze"
4:50-5:00
Hit snooze every 5 minutes until 5 AM hits then jump up in a panic because I should have gotten up at 4:45.
5:00-5:30
Pet the kitties, brush teeth, shower, dry and style hair, make sure Andy is up, figure out what to wear, dress, accessorize
5:30-5:40
Feed kitties, grab breakfast and lunch, stuff things into bags
5:40 AM
Head to the van and curse my Archnemesis: The Stairs

I use the spiders to hold up my papers and notes

5:45 AM
 Leave apartment complex parking lot
5:45-6:15
 Drive to Andy's job, ramble sleepily at Andy while he dozes, look to see if I recognize anyone with a MN license plate
6:15 AM
Drop Andy off at work
6:45-7:00
Arrive at my job
7:00-7:30
Take outfit shot in the rest room, eat breakfast, play Simpsons Tapped Out, read cat memes, read food & recipe emails that I subscribed to when I cooked, um, I mean, maintained my recipe blog
7:30 AM
Clock in to start work

They add a bit of spooky glam to even the most boring of calendars

7:30-9:30
Worky worky work while singing songs to myself or making a game out of the spreadsheets I work on
9:30 AM
Break!  Go to the rest room, decide if the outfit that day is worthy of being uploaded then maybe upload pics from my phone, try to figure out what to do for the other 10 minutes of my break
9:45 - 11:30
Worky worky work while dreaming of the job I thought I would have when I graduated college with an art degree all those years ago
11:30-12:15
Lunch!  Eat while playing Simpsons Tapped Out, perusing blogs or working on pics/posts for mine
12:15 PM
Wish I still took a 60-minute lunch break so I could finish whatever I was working on
12:15-3:45 PM
(*sigh*)  More worky, worky, work with a sneaky bathroom break in the middle
3:45 PM
Break!  Go to the rest room, finish whatever I was working on at lunch

Guess which company I work for? :)

4:00-4:15
Pretend to work for the last 15 minutes of my day
4:15 PM
Grab my stuff and bolt for the elevator, hoping it makes it the full 18 floors down without stopping.  Hope it stops when it reaches the ground floor.
4:25 PM  Leave the parking ramp and head to pick up Andy, make up songs about the other drivers, convince myself that I want to cook dinner, look to see if I recognize anyone with a MN license plate
5:05-5:20
Arrive at Andy's job, answer personal emails while waiting for him to get off work
5:25 PM
Drive home while talking about our days, look to see if I recognize anyone with a MN license plate (it'll happen one day!)
6:15-6:30 PM
 Arrive at home and curse my Archnemesis: The Stairs

I've used other jewelry to adorn my space as well.  This is a bat ring on one of my monitors.

6:30 PM
Realize when I get up the stairs that I really don't feel like cooking and neither does Andy
6:40 PM
Order delivery for dinner - we'll cook TOMORROW.
6:45 PM
Pet the kitties, play Simpsons Tapped Out, take care of bills/household business, check out blogs, shop online
7:30-7:45
Food finally arrives
7:45-9:30
Eat dinner, watch Netflix/Amazon Prime, snuggle with kitties, sing with Claude, talk about going to bed
9:30 PM
Watch just one more episode of something short (right now "Friends")

These are bathroom accessories that I use to hold office stuff

10:00 PM
Get ready for bed but stay up talking for a while, pet Rustle when he comes up on the bed to say good night
10:30 PM
Lights out, pet Sidia and try to convince her to lay down until she finally curls up between my knees
10:45 PM
With any luck, sleep

It's nice to see smiling faces while I work

Made: First Day of School - updated

While I loved how the conjoined twins themselves turned out, the drawing just felt unfinished so I added a background.  What do you think?

Wore: Bats in the Shadows

You've probably noticed this already but if you haven't, I'll point it out: I don't really like to wear prints.  I love prints on other people but I feel so completely out of my element when I wear them myself so the few print items I have are usually delegated to lounge clothes for home only.

I'm trying very hard to get over that.

This is one of my baby steps into the world of graphic prints in public:

Leggings: Hot Topic online
Shoes: Hot Chocolate Designs

This was also my test to see if the plus size leggings on HotTopic.com would actually fit me.  And they do!  Yay!

I know a lot of people aren't fans of Hot Topic and I completely get it.  I rarely step foot inside the store unless I have to go to the mall for some other reason (though I try to avoid that as much as I can).   Online, though, it's a good source for skully clothes in my size. :)

I've worn these a few times now with various dresses and they are starting to grow on me.

Dress: New Look

I also get compliments from strangers whenever I wear them so that helps!  I love getting compliments from Andy, friends, coworkers,etc. but when someone I don't know feels the need to to say something, it just makes my day even more.  

I think I will have to start paying attention to other prints now.  :)

I tried to get a pic of my necklace but no matter what I did, it was cast in a shadow.

Necklace: Wish

I adore Peter Pan collars and this necklace has that feel.  When I got it, there was just a single ring between the 2 halves so the black gemstone would flip up and down when I moved.  That was a bit annoying so I added 2 more rings and put the gem on the center.  Problem solved!  I also had to add a 3" extender to accommodate my larger neck. That's usually a given for me, though, no matter what weight I am.

Selfies always make my nose look bigger.  LOL

How do you feel about prints?  Love 'em?  Hate 'em?

Made: First Day of School

I stayed up too late last night because I had a doodle in my head that I needed to get out.

I call this "First Day of School. "  :)

If anyone is interested in a free print, just let me know and I'll get some made up. :)

Shared: Divination leaves my breath minty fresh!

On Wednesdays, Andy and I have Date Night.  It's usually nothing more than going out for dinner, but it's a night that actually gets us out of the apartment during the work week.  This is also the perfect time to check out new and new-to-us restaurants.  We also have beloved tried-and-trues, of course, especially when we are craving something specific.

This past week, we were both craving pancakes in a major way.  It all started because I was trying to convince him that I was evil via IM at work*:

Andy 1:47 PM: 
You're about as evil as a pancake

Sarrah 1:47 PM: 
Mmm... pancakes....

Andy 1:48 PM: 
and bacon!

Sarrah 1:48 PM: 
Pancakes are evil.  They seduce you with their ability to hold syrup so you eat so many that your tummy gets bloated but then you're just hungry again an hour later.

Andy 1:49 PM: 
Bacon is good, and by the thermogenitic property pancakes are also good.

Sarrah 1:49 PM: 
Good and evil!  
And delicious!

Andy 1:49 PM: 
No, good and delicious
Not evil
like you

Sarrah 1:49 PM: 
No, they are not evil like me.  I am the epitome of evilness!
Muuuwahahahahaaaaaa!

Andy 1:51 PM: 
Now I want pancakes.

Sarrah 1:51 PM: 
Mmm... pancakes...

So we ended up at Cracker Barrel for Date Night and had breakfast. :)

While we were oohing and aahing over the Halloween stuff in their General Store (well, I was, anyway), I found this:

A tin of mints that looks like a Ouija board!  I think I literally squeed and claimed them as mine.  Once we got home and I opened them, squeed again:

The mints themselves look like planchettes!

So the big question after that was "How do they taste?"

Hmm... looks like I need to touch up my color soon...

Pretty much like you'd expect a novelty tin of mints to taste. :)  But the tin is pretty awesome and fits in my fancy lady purse just fine.

I've decided that is was fate that led us to have pancakes which led us to Cracker Barrel which led me to finding my new favorite tin.  Mmm... minty!

In other news, I got back the results of the MRI I had on my knee: torn medial meniscus and torn ACL.  I have an appointment already scheduled with an orthopedist for in a couple of weeks.  I'm pretty sure I'll need surgery since there has been no improvement at all since this happened the beginning of July and which should be fun since I live in a 2nd floor apartment with a curved staircase and no elevator.  I knew it wasn't just arthritis like 2 other doctors told me. :P


* Andy and I work for the same company but in different buildings so we can IM during work. :)

Wore: On Wednesdays, We Wear Pink

"Mean Girls" is one of my guilty pleasure movies.  It's not a "good" movie by any means but it's entertaining.  It also makes me laugh at High School Me because of how hard I tried to fit in to stop from being teased so badly.  The "mean girls" in my school were nowhere to that level but I grew up in a small town in Northern Minnesota.  My graduating class only had 74 kids so it was harder to get away that sort of behavior.  Unfortunately, it made it harder to hide to avoid the tamed down version of that sort of behavior, too.

My favorite line from that movie was "On Wednesdays, we wear pink" so imagine my glee when "American Horror Story: Coven" adapted it to "On Wednesdays, we wear black."  :)  

Source

With the exception of the black nylon knee socks, I'd wear any one of those outfits though I don't think I could pull off the on on the left.  I'm not that chic. 

I love hats.  I really should wear hats more often.  

Anyway, when I got dressed this morning, I realized I was doing a mash up of both.  And since it is Wednesday, I tried to pull off a "mean girl" face.  Nailed it?  LOL

This is one of MANY attempts:

Shrug: I've had it for so long, I don't remember
Dress: New Look
Leggings: Torrid
Shoes: Hot Chocolate Designs (I told you they were my favorites)

Being mean is just not in my nature.  Gleefully sadistic? Sure!  Happily macabre?  You got it!  Morbidly cute?  It's my state of being.  But mean?  No clue.   My phone was nice and made them all my attempts into an animation for me. :)

I forgot to take a "normal" pic, though.  Oops!  

I got my pink nerd robot necklace at the gift shop at the base of the Incline Railway at Lookout Mountain in Chattanooga, TN a while back when my ex and I used to go on road trips.  He doesn't get worn as much as he used to (since I discovered Wish and have a lot of jewelry to choose from now) but he's still one of my favorites. 

I am really looking forward to the 7th season of American Horror Story.  We don't have cable, though, just internet so we'll either need to wait until the whole season comes out or find another way to watch it.  I may even open up my coin purse and pay for it if I get desperate enough.  :)

Craft Along with GIY: Things with Wings (Wing Bats)

Every month, Bane at Goth It Yourself hosts a fun craft-along. This month, the theme is Things with Wings. The very night before, I got to watch a handful of bats playing at dusk which is a rare treat where I live so I knew right away that I wanted to draw a bat picture with my own silly twist. :)

I made the wings on the bucket purple in honor of Bane.

I actually drew this the weekend before last and decided that I needed to use it to send Halloween cards to family this year with the words "This Halloween, Eat, Drink, and Be a little batty!"

Also, in honor of the fact that I have 10 followers now - yayayayay! - I also had some 5x7s printed.  So if you'd like a print, just let me know and I'll send you one! I'll even mail it internationally.  Just send me an email at happyartistgirl @ gmail.com with your address. I promise to not send spam or share your info. :)

7 of 10 prints left

Shared: 30 Cool & Weird Things About Me

Once again, I am happily inspired by Syl at There's Bats In My Coffee and her post "30 Cool Things."  I couldn't think of just cool things about myself because I'm a weird dork so I'm doing a combo post. I'll let you decide which is which. :) And please feel free to tag yourself!  :D

1.  I was born missing a metatarsal in each foot so my 2nd toe branches off the metatarsal of the 3rd toe which makes my feet curve. That's why shoes are so difficult for me to find.

2.  I also have tibial torsion which, fortunately... kinda..., is offset by my feet. I've also trained myself to walk with my feet more straight so it's less obvious.

3.  I was president of our local chapter of the Business Professionals of America my Senior year of high school.

4.  I qualified for nationals in Business and Office Skills during the BFA competition but neither my school nor my parents could afford to send me.

5.  I started college as a Hotel/Restaurant Management major, switched to a Math major/English minor for teaching, but graduated cum laude with a BFA in Studio Sculpture.

6.  I had multiple art shows between ages 21 and 25 and now have pieces owned by people across the world.

7.  I was in the newspaper twice and interviewed on the radio once about my art shows.

8.  I was the Artistic Director for a local arts council in Minnesota when I was also in my early 20's. I was in charge of curating our art shows. It was a volunteer position.

9.  I used to do face painting for kids during various fundraisers.

10. I still make and laugh at poop jokes and innuendos.   Kids love me. :)

11. I won an all-expense paid trip to Savannah to meet Paula Deen. I wrote a 50 word essay on how I deal with my diabetes and was one of 6 winners out of over 10,000 entries.

12. I used to sell note cards, posters, and buttons/pins/badges at art fairs.

13. If I was single, I would probably be a hoarder but Andy keeps my packrat nature at a sane-ish level.

14. I collect cookbooks and recipes.

15. Sometimes cute pictures and videos of cats, puppies, baby elephants, etc. break me and my words come out as gibberish.

16. I anthropomorphize just about everything.  I can't watch hockey because I feel bad for the puck. :P

17. I used to be on the ritual commitee and, for a short while, treasurer of a CUUPs group in Minnesota.

18. The same night I left CUUPs, I was later contacted by someone to see if I was interested in starting a coven with him. When I had to leave MN for GA, we had 5 members and our own traditions. They were truly my family. I miss that sense of belonging here.

19. I identify as Pagan but with Wiccan tendencies. I am currently non-practicing, though.

20. Pizza is my spirit animal.

21. I eat leftovers cold 99% of the time.

22. I don't own a microwave. By choice. The only thing I ever used it for was to boil water or cooking frozen veggies so when I got divorced and moved out, I decided I didn't really need one.

23. When I got divorced, I chose my last name of Settarra (French for "beloved") instead of going back to my maiden name. I decided that I'm going to hyphenate when Andy and I get married (though it will stay Settarra here to protect his privacy).

24. I often get lost in my imagination which was a problem when I was a kid. As an example, when I was 3, I found a Scooby-Doo sandal on my way to day care (I thought I was a big girl walking alone but I found out later that my Mom followed me). I put it on my arm and pretended my arm was broken. When the teacher tried to get me to take it off for a class picture, I screamed because my arm was obviously broken.

25. I learned to read at a very young age. I was reading at a 1st grade level by age 3 and could understand most of the newspaper by age 4. They wanted to put me in 4th grade when I started 1st grade but Mom said no because she was scared I wouldn't fit in. I still didn't but how could she know? :)

26. I am a condiment whore. Our fridge is full of various sauces, dressings, mustards, etc.

27. I have sent grocery gift cards anonymously to friends going through hard times.

28. I am really good at planning parties and events and also enjoy it.

29. I am a list maker which comes in handy for planning parties and events. :)

30. I was in ballet when I was little. The only good things the teacher could say about me is that I was enthusiastic and good at spinning. I'm still good at spinning. :)

Wore: It's ME!

My knee is getting worse, to the point where driving almost brings me to tears and it wakes me up at night.  Unfortunately, I can't get in to see an orthopedist for over 3 weeks.  But because I am not sleeping well, I am drinking a lot more caffeine during the day.

Caffeine (and sugar) affect me the way it would a 5-year-old.  When I pick Andy up from work, he can tell when I've had more than usual (or if someone had cake or donuts at work that day).  I think this pic sort of illustrates this:

Dress: SWAK Design
Leggings: New Look
Shoes: Hot Chocolate Designs
Necklaces: gifts from Andy

This was the only picture I took where I wasn't blurry.  LOL

Here's a close up of my beloved Nightmare Before Christmas necklaces that Andy got me for Yule:

The bottom one is actually 2 halves that are meant to be BFF necklaces but I put them together on one long chain instead.  I almost always wear the 2 necklaces together.  I've read that some people think Nightmare Before Christmas is overrated and overdone but I don't care.  It's still one of my favorite movies. :)

Because of the knee pain being overwhelming, we've been using a free trial of Fresh Cart on Amazon Prime to have groceries delivered to us which has been SO NICE!  They don't have everything we need so Andy still has to run in to get a few of his essentials but it's better than putting the whole grocery trip on him while I sit out in the minivan.

We also got really behind on laundry since we don't have a washer/dryer in our apartment.  We decided that we could afford to use a laundry service to get caught up so I found a good one that also had free pick up.  And it really was free.  Most other places I looked at charged more per pound to cover their "free" service.  Pfft.  I can math!

It felt weird sending my clothes out with some stranger.  Especially because it was such a large chunk of my wardrobe.  What if they ruined it?  What if they stole it?  What if it ended up on the black market??  Andy told me to calm my imagination down.  :)  

We had them pick up the clothes on Thursday afternoon (Andy's day off) and drop them back off Saturday when we were home.  All the clothes came back and they were folded so nicely.  Even my bras and underwear.  I never fold my undergarments.

Sidia wasted no time and jumped on everything as soon as we laid it on the bed.  Every time I open a drawer, I am still amazed at how neatly everything is folded.  All the things that are different sizes are folded to be the same size and quite compact without folds or wrinkles.  I'm really not sure how they did that!  It just showed me how much I am lacking when it comes to domestic skills. :)

Just so he doesn't get jealous, here's a picture of Rustle in a rare moment of stillness.  (That's why his name is a verb and not a noun.)

Lastly, Andy bought me a Baby Groot doll who has quickly become best friends with Claude van Dumm.  They are pretty much inseparable at this point.  Their conversations crack me up, though!  They basically go like this:

(*singing*) "My name is Claude van Dumm Dumm Dumm!"

"I am Groot!"

"My name is Claude"

"I am Groot?"

(*singing*)  "van Dumm Dumm Dumm!"

"I am Groot."

"And my name is Claude."

"I am... Groot."

"Your name is Groot?"

"I am Groot!"

(*singing*) "My name is Claude van Dumm Dumm Dumm!"

"I am Groot."

(*singing*) "Van Groot Groot Groot!"

Shared: From Unnoticed to ME!

This is a little text heavy, just to warn you. :)

Recently, Syl from There's Bats In My Coffee posted about rediscovering goth after going through a "normal" phase and it got me to thinking about my own path.  As a little kid, my Mom and Grandma pretty much dressed me and as long I was comfortable or as long as the dress/skirt twiiiiirled, I didn't really care.  My mom liked to either dress me like Holly Hobby/Laura Ingalls or in miniature versions of what she wore.

When I was 10, I blossomed much earlier than the rest of my class so dressed to hide it as much as I could.  Whenever I dressed up, the older boys (my school was K-12) would make lewd comments.  I didn't understand most of what they were referring to but their tone made me uncomfortable so I tried to just go unnoticed and almost always kept my jacket on.

Throughout high school, I was teased mercilessly because I was just plain weird.  I watched horror movies and read horror novels, I didn't listen to the top 40 (mostly 50's 60's, and classic rock), I saved most of my allowance and babysitting for college (really!), I wore thrifted clothes, I didn't follow celebrity gossip (still don't for the most part), I had a fascination with food and cooking, I made things to hang in my locker instead of beefcakes posters, you get the idea.

And it only got worse if I tried to fit in so I did my best to just be unnoticed, though it didn't really work.

In Junior high, I remember crying to my Gramma about how hard I tried to be like the other kids even though I hated it.  She asked me why I wanted to be like everyone else and I told her that I was tired of being teased and bullied.  My Gramma pointed out that I was already trying and it wasn't obviously working so why bother being miserable with my choice AND being miserable because the kids were jerks?  In her opinion, I could at least be happy in half the equation.

That actually made sense.

So I still tried to dress in a rather nondescript at school to avoid being noticed but embraced the other things I loved that I was ignoring in an attempt to be "normal."  I went back to collecting recipes, making things out of colored paper and magazines to hang in my locker, reading horror novels, writing, etc.  Outside of school, I would wear whatever style I was experimenting with at the time.  That ranged from 50s-70s dresses, feminized menswear, black... a lot of black.

By my Senior year, the bullying had calmed down since I no longer reacted to it but the teasing never stopped.   Also by this time, my wardrobe was probably about 85% black with a lot of black turtlenecks, long skirts, and long dresses with a large number of jewel-toned sweaters and blouses.

Sadly, when I went off to college, I adopted the standard wardrobe of sweatshirts and flannel.  LOL  But I went to a small university in the middle of corn fields so it was cold and people really looked down on kids who were "artsy", even in the art department which was kind of weird.

Right after college, at age 22, I got married to my first husband which was a mistake in many, many ways.  He did not allow me to wear much black along with a lot of other things that weren't allowed, like friends and artwork.  In the first 12 months that we were married, I gained 150 lbs.  Yep.  150 lbs in 12 months. So not only was I alone and miserable, my health was at risk and I quickly went back to my Please Don't Notice Me style.

My doctor wrote me a prescription to "divorce 1 (one) husband" which I did when I was 25.  (I miss that doctor!)

It was around this time that I met my now ex-husband.  He was nice and safe and supportive.  While married to him, I was free to get back into doing artsy things and just being as weird I wanted.  I could embrace my love of horror and creepy things and was able to dedicate myself to the Pagan path that was right for me.  It felt good.  But I still dressed to go unnoticed.

6th grade: I wore my jacket all the time with the zipper all the way up.
Age 22: Right after I married my first husband
Age 29: Right after I married my ex-husband

Age 29: My ex and I had a Renaissance wedding!

Age 30: This was taken at a Mary Kay makeover party.  LOL
I felt so glamorous, though!

A year after my ex and I got married, we moved from Minnesota to Georgia because he got a job here.  We knew absolutely no one and he had no interest in making new friends.  I spent the first 2 years here content with working then going home to either play computer games, watching movies, or fiddling around in my studio.  After 2 years, though, I realized I was lonely.  Since he had no interest in making friends, I went by myself to meet ups, etc.

It was at one gathering that completely changed my sense of style.  People kept mistaking me for someone named "Rosie" and commenting on how much I looked like her.  When I finally met her, I was mortified!  She was in her upper 50's and looked every bit of it (I was 32), had short hair (mine was long but in a ponytail), and a heavy smoker (I've never smoked).  But... we were both overweight, wore similar clothes, and had the same hair color.

Something needed to change.

I reached out to my little sister for help and she said, "So you finally want to stop dressing like Mom, huh?"  That clinched it. :)

A few years ago: I met Bobby Deen and Paula Deen, y'all!

Paula Deen with the packs of note cards I gave her (that I designed)

I started wearing my beloved black again which felt so natural, so good, so nice.  I cut my hair short then dyed it black and pink which I've had since then.  I started wearing the gothy jewelry that I always drooled over.  I got rid of the wire frames and started wearing funky black glasses.  Because of my size, I mostly just wore black pants with black shirts but it worked well enough for me at the time.

I taught myself to sew and discovered a love for refashioning.  I realized that Torrid and Hot Topic carried clothing in my size online and have been more patient in scouring the internet for black clothing.  I learned from Coffin Kitsch and Gothy Two Shoes that I could wear leggings under short skirts/dresses which opened up a huge new world for me.  Footwear has always been an issue because of my feet and legs but Hot Chocolate Designs has now helped with that. :)

I get looks from strangers but it's mostly smiles.  The disapproving looks from the elderly Southern Belles or my many Latino neighbors actually just amuse me.  No one picks on me for how I look or how I act.

I have slowly been building up my wardrobe and accessories to match "me" better since then.  Even my mom has commented on how my outside matches my inside better than it ever has before which is one of the best compliments I've ever gotten.

It's good to be me. :)

About 4 years ago

Shared: Wedding - My Dress

I had an MRI yesterday for my knee and, honestly, I am regretting it today.  The MRI itself wasn't bad but I had to lay on my back with my leg in a very uncomfortable position for over an hour.  I couldn't move it at all and I was reduced to tears more than once due to the pain and my whole body hurts today because of it.  Right now, my knee is hovering at about 7 on the pain scale.

My appointment with an orthopedist isn't until the end of the month so I have to deal with this pain for another 4 weeks.

(*sigh*)

So, instead of wallowing in my misery, I want to share my wedding dress.  Yay!  :D

When Andy and I first talked about getting married, I told him I wanted a black corset with a black floor length tutu that had enough tulle to knock over a small child.  He said he wasn't a fan of his bride wearing all black to the wedding and, while that is my typical color palette, I could respect that.  So I changed it to a dark red corset. :)

Because of my size and shape, I knew from experience that I'd likely have to get one custom made so I started pricing them.  Unfortunately, the corset alone was turning out to be more than my $400 budget (I'm a frugal bargain hunter LOL) unless I wanted a leather one (which I didn't).  So after A LOT of online browsing finally settled on this:

from Kiyonna

The fit on me is a little different with the bottom of the dress being less fitted.  I got it at 40% off so the dress was only $113.  I liked the dress okay and tried as I might to love it, I just didn't.  It wasn't what I wanted and it felt so matronly to me.  But I was going to make it work.

Andy was trying to convince me that I should just get what I wanted since it's our wedding day but I just couldn't justify in my mind spending that kind of money on something that I will probably wear up to 3 times in my life.

Then the Wedding Dress Gods smiled upon me.  During lunch one day, I did a Google search for plus size goth clothes so I could do some window shopping and was directed to a post on The Everyday Goth which is a blog I've lurked followed for quite a while.  But since I wasn't in the market for clothes at that time, I forgot she had made this post.

One of the stores she listed was Corset Story.  I didn't have high hopes based on experience with other corset shops online but I found this:

from Corset Story

Not only did it claim to be in a size to fit me, it was also surprisingly inexpensive at just $159 plus $6.50 for shipping.  After checking out their return policy, I decided it was worth a shot and gave it an order.  I tried very hard to not get my hopes up.  I tired and I tried and I tried.  When I got it... it fit perfectly!  Thankfully, Andy knows how to lace up a corset. :)

Then a few days later, I lucked out again during some normal window shopping and found this skirt on Amazon Prime for just $42. :)

from Amazon (comes in a lot of different colors and sizes)

It's not enough tulle to knock over a small child but with the natural padding on my hips and butt, you can't tell.

Since the corset leaves me feeling a bit exposed, I picked up a lace body suit from Torrid for about $36 to wear under it:

from Torrid

I'm not going to count the shipping fee from Torrid because I ordered a few other things from there as well.  Even if you include the dress from Kiyonna that I'm NOT wearing for the wedding, I only spent $356 which is still under my initial $400 budget. :) I will likely change into the "backup dress" during the reception or later in the night when I can't handle being bound up in the corset anymore.

Oh, the shoes!  I don't have them yet but I am going to get these from Hot Chocolate Designs.  I know the red doesn't match the corset but they will be mostly hidden anyway.  Plus, it's a good excuse to add them to my small footwear rotation. ;)

from Hot Chocolate Designs on Amazon

For jewelry and accessories, I am not 100% sure what I will be wearing yet.  I like to have options since my mood changes from one to the next so I have about 3 headpieces, 3 necklaces, and 2 pairs of earrings that I will decide between the day of the wedding.  I already own most of them and only picked up 2 of the head pieces and 1 of the necklaces to add to the option list.  All 3 are from Wish so I only spent about $10 with shipping.  I also have 3 pairs of fancy black lace long fingerless gloves coming from Wish as well.  So maybe $20 total spent on accessories.

All in all, I think I did pretty well with my choices and was able to get what I really wanted.  Yay! :D