Shared: Sarrahs That Say "Knee!"

I have finally seen the orthopedist and it didn't go quite as I had thought it would.  He confirmed the torn meniscus and the torn ACL but said there's not much he can do about either.  The arthritis is so bad in my knee that it is tearing the mensicus away which, in his words, is not bad because it will eventually wear a groove.  If he fixed it, then it would just tear more.

The outfit I wore for my ortho appointment
Top: Torrid
Skirt: Jessica London
Necklace: Cameo I put together
Fancy lady purse: Unique Vintage

He also said that I will almost certainly need knee replacement surgery in about 10-20 years.

I asked what I can do in the mean time for the pain which has been leaving me in tears way more than I'd like.  He said to take Tylenol Arthritis and Aleve (which I've been doing since this started in July with no relief).  He also gave me a steroid shot in my knee which, unbeknownst to me, made my knee hurt WAAAAAAY worse.  I bawled the entire way home from the pain.  A couple days, later, fortunately, there was marked improvement to the pain and mobility and it's been slowly feeling better.  He also gave me an anti-inflammatory medication which seems to be helping as well.

Random outfit from a few days later
Dress: Torrid
Leggings: New Look
Shoes: Hot Chocolate Design

He gave me sheets with knee exercises that I can start doing now that my knee feels a little better but it was a very frustrating experience.  I'm not sure how long the steroid shot is supposed to last but if/when I start to have issues again, I am going to ask to see a different doctor, I think.

I'm just glad that it's at least improved even if it hasn't improved 100%.

And just because I feel weird only having two pics (I prefer odd numbers), here is a picture of my rings. :)

Wore: Break-A-Leg

HI!!!

Hi!  So nice to see you!  How are you?  Glad to hear it!  Me?  Oh, I'm fine.  Thanks for asking.  No, really... I'm okay.  Yeah, my knee still really, really, really hurts but I'm trying to not be a whiner about it.  It's to the point where I just want to cry every time I have to walk more than 20 steps.  But, the good news is I *FINALLY* have an appointment with the orthopedist next week.  Yay!

Unfortunately, because I am spending a lot more time with my leg up, I am online shopping way more than I should be.  I can justify about 75% of the purchases, at least.  Like the bottles for the wedding mead Andy is making.  I also recently got this top from New Look while it was on super sale:

New Look

The mirror at work was super streaky so I couldn't get a full body shot, though.  I paired this with one of my long black skirts so you can probably imagine the rest. The mesh makes me feel super edgy and broody as you can see in the top picture.  LOL  I still feel kinda bad ass, though.  As bad ass as I can feel anyway.

Here's a more "serious" one.  ;)

It's SO serious that the shadow of my nose is pointing out my chin pimple quite nicely.

For date night last week, it was my turn to choose so I chose to go to Joe's Crab Shack.  I will spare my non-meat-eating friend any specific details (sorry, Goth Gardener!) but my meal came with this bib which made me laugh more than a sane, rational adult probably should have.  At least that was Andy's take on my giggles. :)

It also seemed apropos since my leg is gimpy.  I love that word.  Apropos.

Anyway...Do you partake in retail therapy?  If so, what's your go-to store, shop, or website?

Until later, sweet p'taters!

(Yes, I am overly-caffeinated right now  Why do you ask?  LOL)

Wore: Bats in the Shadows

You've probably noticed this already but if you haven't, I'll point it out: I don't really like to wear prints.  I love prints on other people but I feel so completely out of my element when I wear them myself so the few print items I have are usually delegated to lounge clothes for home only.

I'm trying very hard to get over that.

This is one of my baby steps into the world of graphic prints in public:

Leggings: Hot Topic online
Shoes: Hot Chocolate Designs

This was also my test to see if the plus size leggings on HotTopic.com would actually fit me.  And they do!  Yay!

I know a lot of people aren't fans of Hot Topic and I completely get it.  I rarely step foot inside the store unless I have to go to the mall for some other reason (though I try to avoid that as much as I can).   Online, though, it's a good source for skully clothes in my size. :)

I've worn these a few times now with various dresses and they are starting to grow on me.

Dress: New Look

I also get compliments from strangers whenever I wear them so that helps!  I love getting compliments from Andy, friends, coworkers,etc. but when someone I don't know feels the need to to say something, it just makes my day even more.  

I think I will have to start paying attention to other prints now.  :)

I tried to get a pic of my necklace but no matter what I did, it was cast in a shadow.

Necklace: Wish

I adore Peter Pan collars and this necklace has that feel.  When I got it, there was just a single ring between the 2 halves so the black gemstone would flip up and down when I moved.  That was a bit annoying so I added 2 more rings and put the gem on the center.  Problem solved!  I also had to add a 3" extender to accommodate my larger neck. That's usually a given for me, though, no matter what weight I am.

Selfies always make my nose look bigger.  LOL

How do you feel about prints?  Love 'em?  Hate 'em?

Wore: On Wednesdays, We Wear Pink

"Mean Girls" is one of my guilty pleasure movies.  It's not a "good" movie by any means but it's entertaining.  It also makes me laugh at High School Me because of how hard I tried to fit in to stop from being teased so badly.  The "mean girls" in my school were nowhere to that level but I grew up in a small town in Northern Minnesota.  My graduating class only had 74 kids so it was harder to get away that sort of behavior.  Unfortunately, it made it harder to hide to avoid the tamed down version of that sort of behavior, too.

My favorite line from that movie was "On Wednesdays, we wear pink" so imagine my glee when "American Horror Story: Coven" adapted it to "On Wednesdays, we wear black."  :)  

Source

With the exception of the black nylon knee socks, I'd wear any one of those outfits though I don't think I could pull off the on on the left.  I'm not that chic. 

I love hats.  I really should wear hats more often.  

Anyway, when I got dressed this morning, I realized I was doing a mash up of both.  And since it is Wednesday, I tried to pull off a "mean girl" face.  Nailed it?  LOL

This is one of MANY attempts:

Shrug: I've had it for so long, I don't remember
Dress: New Look
Leggings: Torrid
Shoes: Hot Chocolate Designs (I told you they were my favorites)

Being mean is just not in my nature.  Gleefully sadistic? Sure!  Happily macabre?  You got it!  Morbidly cute?  It's my state of being.  But mean?  No clue.   My phone was nice and made them all my attempts into an animation for me. :)

I forgot to take a "normal" pic, though.  Oops!  

I got my pink nerd robot necklace at the gift shop at the base of the Incline Railway at Lookout Mountain in Chattanooga, TN a while back when my ex and I used to go on road trips.  He doesn't get worn as much as he used to (since I discovered Wish and have a lot of jewelry to choose from now) but he's still one of my favorites. 

I am really looking forward to the 7th season of American Horror Story.  We don't have cable, though, just internet so we'll either need to wait until the whole season comes out or find another way to watch it.  I may even open up my coin purse and pay for it if I get desperate enough.  :)

Wore: It's ME!

My knee is getting worse, to the point where driving almost brings me to tears and it wakes me up at night.  Unfortunately, I can't get in to see an orthopedist for over 3 weeks.  But because I am not sleeping well, I am drinking a lot more caffeine during the day.

Caffeine (and sugar) affect me the way it would a 5-year-old.  When I pick Andy up from work, he can tell when I've had more than usual (or if someone had cake or donuts at work that day).  I think this pic sort of illustrates this:

Dress: SWAK Design
Leggings: New Look
Shoes: Hot Chocolate Designs
Necklaces: gifts from Andy

This was the only picture I took where I wasn't blurry.  LOL

Here's a close up of my beloved Nightmare Before Christmas necklaces that Andy got me for Yule:

The bottom one is actually 2 halves that are meant to be BFF necklaces but I put them together on one long chain instead.  I almost always wear the 2 necklaces together.  I've read that some people think Nightmare Before Christmas is overrated and overdone but I don't care.  It's still one of my favorite movies. :)

Because of the knee pain being overwhelming, we've been using a free trial of Fresh Cart on Amazon Prime to have groceries delivered to us which has been SO NICE!  They don't have everything we need so Andy still has to run in to get a few of his essentials but it's better than putting the whole grocery trip on him while I sit out in the minivan.

We also got really behind on laundry since we don't have a washer/dryer in our apartment.  We decided that we could afford to use a laundry service to get caught up so I found a good one that also had free pick up.  And it really was free.  Most other places I looked at charged more per pound to cover their "free" service.  Pfft.  I can math!

It felt weird sending my clothes out with some stranger.  Especially because it was such a large chunk of my wardrobe.  What if they ruined it?  What if they stole it?  What if it ended up on the black market??  Andy told me to calm my imagination down.  :)  

We had them pick up the clothes on Thursday afternoon (Andy's day off) and drop them back off Saturday when we were home.  All the clothes came back and they were folded so nicely.  Even my bras and underwear.  I never fold my undergarments.

Sidia wasted no time and jumped on everything as soon as we laid it on the bed.  Every time I open a drawer, I am still amazed at how neatly everything is folded.  All the things that are different sizes are folded to be the same size and quite compact without folds or wrinkles.  I'm really not sure how they did that!  It just showed me how much I am lacking when it comes to domestic skills. :)

Just so he doesn't get jealous, here's a picture of Rustle in a rare moment of stillness.  (That's why his name is a verb and not a noun.)

Lastly, Andy bought me a Baby Groot doll who has quickly become best friends with Claude van Dumm.  They are pretty much inseparable at this point.  Their conversations crack me up, though!  They basically go like this:

(*singing*) "My name is Claude van Dumm Dumm Dumm!"

"I am Groot!"

"My name is Claude"

"I am Groot?"

(*singing*)  "van Dumm Dumm Dumm!"

"I am Groot."

"And my name is Claude."

"I am... Groot."

"Your name is Groot?"

"I am Groot!"

(*singing*) "My name is Claude van Dumm Dumm Dumm!"

"I am Groot."

(*singing*) "Van Groot Groot Groot!"

Wore: Mmm... Ribs

As the wedding grows near (108 days away, if you are curious), I am:
     Super excited - I am literally marrying my best friend
     A little nervous - this isn't a first marriage for either of us
     Kind of anxious - I am mostly done with my DIY stuff but I still get a panicky when I think of what's left to do
     Super excited - both our families are going to be in GA for the wedding weekend
     A little nervous - this will be the first time both sides will meet each other
     A little sad - I keep thinking about the people who have passed who won't be here to share in the day

Specifically, I keep thinking about Andy's favorite cousin who was like a brother to him, my favorite uncle, and especially my Gramma.

At age 38, she was pregnant with my Mom in this picture... look at those cheekbones!

I always had an especially close relationship with my Gramma, often spending the night at her apartment.  She taught me to sew, cook, play poker and black jack.  She taught me that it was okay to be myself even when others made of fun of me (though that lesson took a long time for me to learn).

She always had a cigarette hanging from her lips, especially while she was crocheting and watching her soap operas.  One of my earliest memories of her was in her brother's garden.  He would let his family take home whatever they wanted as long as they helped weed.  I remember my Gramma wearing a shimmering silver blouse, black slacks, and silver sandals while gardening... with her signature Pall Mall dangling from her red painted lips.

My Gramma was a walking dichotomy.  :)

She had a brain aneurysm the day after my 15th birthday but miraculously survived.  (She was always a tough broad.)  She had brain damage which caused a lot of psychological issues and she had to be in an assisted living home followed by a nursing home before she passed away 12 years after the aneurysm that would have killed most people.

Her birthday is in April and I still celebrate it every year by making one of her signature meals.  Most often, it's her barbecued spare ribs but roast or fried chicken and pound cake are my go-to's as well.

Dancing to some random song in my head

Dress: Torrid
Leggings: New Look
Shoes: Hot Chocolate Designs

I think she would have heartily disapproved of my pink hair at first but would have come to love it because she considered me her kid instead of her grandkid.  She didn't seem to care that I wore mostly black because she had a lot of black in her own wardrobe.  I don't know how she would have felt about the tattoos but she loved all my earrings.

She would have LOVED this dress, though, because of all the sparkles.  My Gramma LOVED sparkly clothes and jewelry.

It's hard to see but there are a ot of little sequins mixed in with the beads.

I often think she still comes to visit me, especially when I need her.  I will suddenly smell cigarette smoke in a place where it shouldn't be.  Like when I lived in my house with my ex-husband.  We're non-smokers and were far from the road, plus we didn't allow smoking in the house.  So when I smelled it, I knew it was her.  When I am especially sad or depressed, I will feel a hand on my right shoulder followed by a little squeeze.  That's something she used to do when overseeing me sew, etc.

So while she will not be physically with us for the wedding, I know Gramma will still be there.  I am her kid after all and I know she wouldn't miss it for the world..

Necklace: Cute and Creepy Inc

Wore: Feeling like a lunatic

Every have one of those days where you wake up and nothing feels right?  That's what I was going through the day I wore this:

Dress: New Look
Leggings: New Look
Shrug: Torrid
Shoes: Hot Chocolate Design
Necklace: Black Box subscription box (now defunct)
Bracelet: t-shirt hem from a DIY

I mean, you can even see it in my face which is unusual.  I am one of those people who usually has a grin even in resting face mode.  I woke up with an extremely unhappy stomach only to realize that I had had wheat the night before plus Dexter** was going to be making an appearance so between those 2 things, my stomach was extremely bloated and distended.  I didn't realize I needed gas that morning so that made us run late which always makes me frazzled and people at work were just being dumb.  Everything just seemed sucky.  (I could go on about the little things that made this day crappy but I think you get the idea.)

If I had had the sick time, I would have called in sick.  Actually, I wouldn't have because I have too guilty a conscience to call in for a mental health day but I would have thought about it really hard.

I figured my full moon necklace was a good accessory for this day.  It glows in the dark but I don't get to experience that much during the day.  Stupid day star and fluorescent lighting. ;)

On a positive note for this post, I am really digging some of the clothes at New Look.  They are a UK based online store (8 day shipping to the US!) and you have to kind of dig for gothy-type wear but they are good for basics like dresses and leggings.  Their legging are some of my favorites because they are so lightweight!  In fact, I have 6-8 pairs from them now.  I also love the fact that the arm holes on their plus size dresses aren't gapingly huge like the arms of US-based plus size clothing I have.  This dress is sleeveless and I could wear it without the shrug outside of work if I wanted to without the sides of my bra showing through the arm holes.  For this particular dress, the fabric is a touch itchy for my overly-sensitive skin but I love the look of the texture.

I'm not being paid to sing their praises.  I just really like them. :)

Anyway, after having a meh day, we decided to order tacos for dinner and I made Andy sit through British murder mysteries ("Midsomer Mysteries" on Netflix this time) and I cuddled with Claude van Dumm, my mostest favoritest Bearly Dreadful that I've ever made.

What do you do to cheer yourself up?



** Dexter is the code name for my period because he's a serial killing blood spatter analyst. :)

Wore: Black Cats

Someday, when I grow up to be big and strong, I want to be a crazy lady.  If I didn't let practicality get in the way, I would have way more than the 2 I have currently.  I'm not to the point where I want everything I own to be covered with cat prints but I can't see a cat anywhere without declaring "You're a kitty!" and trying to pet it.

I do, however, own a few cat-related pieces of jewelry which I know will make an appearance here over time.  Like these cat collar pins that I got from a defunct subscription box service (that also took money from me and never shipped boxes).

It was the first subscription box ever joined and I was really excited.  For $23 a month, they would send about 6 gothy-type things.  I paid in October and got my November box halfway through December.  I paid in November and my December box never arrived.  They said they were waiting for something that was back ordered.  I paid in December and got my January box at the end of February after I complained.  Meanwhile, the auto payment had already paid in February for March.  After the March payment hit with no sign of a February box (or December box yet), I canceled my subscription.  I wrote to them about 3 boxes that I had paid for but never received but the site was more or less down.  It's just $69 total so I can't see wasting time and more money to go after them.  It's really very disappointing.

I can't help but make faces in the mirror!
Dress: Hot Topic online
Leggings: New Look
Shoes: Hot Chocolate Designs
Bracelet: a bit of cut up t-shirt hem from a DIY over the weekend

I did get a couple of cool things out of the 2 boxes I did receive, though, like the pins which I think look good on my black dress with the white collar.  The pin backs are too centered, however, so the top heavy kitty heads have a tendency to spin.  I always forget about fixing that until I am wearing the dress again.

On this particular day, I also opted to wear a headband.  I don't usually wear hair accessories because I have a headset at work but this one seemed to complete the look:

Headband: Wish

Sorry for the complete lack of make up!  With it being so hot out right now, I tend to go completely without because my face melts off.  The make up thing is actually a little funny because I did end up joining another subscription service: Ipsy.  I know A LOT of people who belong to this and I love, love, love it... especially the make up bags themselves. :)

Do you belong to any fun subscription services?